Thursday, February 9, 2012
HISTORY OF SEX: Part 5
Hordes of young lovers. Porcelain dildos. Death by horse?
There are few female historical figures with as many sexual urban legends as Russia's Catherine the Great. One of the first was that she had her lover, Gregory Orlov, kill her husband, Peter III, after she staged a coup d'état. Orlov apparently hoped that she would be so grateful that she would make him her co-ruler but alas, he was to be disappointed.
After a long term relationship with Gregory Potemkin, Catherine had a series of lovers who were usually 20 to 30 years younger than her. Potemkin, possibly the best ex-boyfriend ever, would hand-pick young noblemen he thought would pique her interest. When Catherine tired of a young lover, she would grant him a hefty pension and a nice chunk of land.
Legend has it that Catherine was so enamored of one lucky lover's penis, she had it cast in porcelain so that she could enjoy it any time she wanted.
The most prevalent urban legend about Catherine the Great is know by even the most history-illiterate fool...that she suffered either a heart attack or stroke whilst being pleasured by a horse. There isn't enough room in this post to rant about the misogyny and ignorance that has perpetuated this myth but rest assured, historians are in agreement that this did NOT happen.
Catherine ruled over one of the largest empires in the world, abolished serfdom, expanded Russia's borders, and had a steady stream of pretty young things in the bedroom. Not too shabby.
WHEN THE SYNERGY OF TWO AUTHORS COLLIDE, A NEW STORY IS TOLD. WITHOUT RISK, LIFE IS STAGNANT.
Thank you, GB, King of collaboration!
EPISODE SEVEN FROM GRAFFITI BLEU'S INFAMOUS SIMONY CHIAVARY:
click on the tab GUEST #33 at the top of the page to read the full episode.